In the middle of the world, make one positive step. In the center of chaos, make one definitive act. Just write. Say yes, stay alive, be awake. Just write. Just write. Just write. – Natalie Goldberg
I have chicken I need to pack for the freezer and laundry to fold. Clients to call and animals to crochet. If I let my mind go, I can feel my chest knotting up.
So I don’t let my mind go. I choose, instead, to stay here, right now, with the big bruise on my thigh that peeks out from under my earflap boxer shorts, with the final bite of S’s great sweet potato muffin on my plate, with fatigue and good moments tugging at me to take a day on the couch. I know these things, and yet, still, I choose to write.
It’s always a choice – to do something else or to do this thing that settles me and vibrates my spirit in just the perfect way. I have missed it these past four days, even as I purposefully set the words aside in favor of people. I feel filled up with love, but I feel edgy, uneven, as if I’m leaking a bit out the seams of myself . . . I need my writing today to align me. Like a chiropractor twisting my hips just the right way to get that perfect crack and snap into place.
Right now, for the next hour, I will put aside the thoughts of blankets that need to be stored and cat litter that must be cleaned because I need the writing first. I need to let it slide into me like molten pewter filling a collapsing silk mold. I need to feel its strength push me back out to my full self again. . .
So I just write.
What might you need to put aside for just an hour so that you can settle into yourself again? After you do it, tell me how you feel?Buffer